I had endured an unsuccessful one-nighter (when the bloke in question bragged “I can keep this boner all night!” I slid from under him and went to make a cup of tea...) and was trying to avoid him the next weekend in the club I loved. When he asked why I hadn’t been in when he called the next day (I had been: my friend and I were clutching each other in silent horror and hysterics on the floor) I faked tears and “sobbed” on my friend’s shoulder while she harangued him for being a total swine and not bothering to turn up, breaking my heart! I never saw him again...mercifully!

Ulrike L, 36, United Kingdom

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